Post-op MRI

Tomorrow is my first post-op MRI. I think I am just as nervous about this as I was for the surgery. Mainly because this determines if I need a second craniotomy. Two brain surgeries in one year is insane. I previously said that I would prefer surgery over radiation or chemo and I still stand by that statement but the idea of another surgery is frightening. With my newest diagnosis chemo and radiation is not readily used, so the only real option is surgery. I bounced back from my surgery much better then I (or my doctors) anticipated. I worry that another surgery wont be as easy. Actually I know it wont be.
I joke with most people that I am back to "my old self." But I notice deficits that most people dont (or dont mention to me). I have short term and working memory problems. It has somewhat improved since the surgery, but it is still the greatest area of weakness for me. At work I interact with a lot people (classroom teachers, paras, PTs, OTs, nurses) on a daily basis. I often forget who I spoke to about what, so I often repeat myself or not tell someone something that I am supposed to. I have 21 kids on my caseload and since I always have taken good notes and data, this has luckily not been much of an issue. The fact that everyday I have a different schedule does not help the situation. I find myself half way down the hallway forgetting which student I am picking up. Post-its have become my best friend. I am using a lot of strategies that I have taught clients with TBIs. Wow I have a brain injury, it is still hard to digest. I have a lot of trouble writing and spelling. I find that I forget how to write simple words and I have no idea how to figure it out at that moment. Sometimes I even forget how to form letters. I am writing a ton of run-on sentences. My grammar issues bother me a lot since this is what I teach my students and I am a stickler about grammar rules. I also have word finding issues and use the wrong words and names. It is embarrassing, but as a speech pathologist I know how to work on it. But getting around to it is another story. I keep putting more and more on my plate without taking care of myself. I am trying so hard to get back to my "normal life" but I need to figure out if that is the life I want back. I have to look at my new priorities and adjust my life accordingly. I keep hoping that I can do this once all the doctor appointments calm down a bit, but something else always comes up. This week alone my ferret needed emergency surgery and Karl's 91 year old grandmother broke her hip. What is normal anyway?