Not again

Today I met with my neurologist to discuss the past two weeks. The epilepsy board presented my case and decided that I NEED to have a temporal lobectomy. The reasons seemed to make sense as my neurologist's office, but now as I process it I do not understand. I know they are worried that my brain is damaged from the seizures and they do not want further deterioration. What I do not understand is why take out my brain- which is damaging it even more. They seem to make this decision so lightly without asking how I feel about it. I can live with these seizures, not missing a lobe of my brain. They have to do a lot of testing. The next test is just as scary as a surgery. It is WADA test, which means they put half of your brain asleep to see how it functions. I cannot imagine how it feels to not move on one side, talk, or remember a thing. What a scary thought. I know it is better to find this information out now and not after the surgery. I cannot process having brain surgery AGAIN and more aggressive. I hope the surgeon appointment tomorrow will answer some of my questions. I plan on getting a second opinion from another top epilepsy center. I am so scared and in total shock about the reality of this news.